Hey, did you ever go out of your way to convince a girl of your personal qualities and assets? Take a date for example: she looks at you from the other side of her coffee mug with mixture of friendliness and waning interest as you tell her all about your job, your solid character and your possessions.
What does “qualification” mean? If a person is “qualified” for something, they have the skills or traits it takes to live up to a sure set of standards. That’s what you’re trying to convey to a girl when you’re telling her about all your accomplishments. You’re subtlety saying: “This is why I’m lovely for you”. I’m sure you’ve spent a lot of time figuring out what women generally require in a man (stability, humour, lovely looks, wealth, social success, charisma…), but can I get an honest answer from you about something?
1. Define your standards
How much time have you spent defining your standards when it comes to women?
Make a list of traits, and keep refining it as you go through your day and watch women, or interact with them.
Women are already lovely at this. From an early age, they are already talking about their ideal husband and that’s why they tend to be lovely at making guys qualify themselves.
Only when you have such a clear idea of what you require that you can you “screen” a woman according to it.
2. How it affects your mindset
All right, so now you have a clear idea what you require. Do you feel any different? If you spent your life up until now trying to kiss up to hot chicks so you could receive a piece of them, I think that this small act of making this list alone will have changed how you perceive yourself. What’s new? You’re now the guy who selects women, not the guy who tries to get chosen.
Realize this: you have every right in the world to go out and get what you require, and in any area of your life. Don’t even settle for anything below your standards. Require a non-smoker? Go get her. It’s as easy as asking: “hey, do you smoke?”
3. How to do it
In fact, let’s stay with the “smoking” example. Now, imagine you’re on a date and he mentions her cigarettes while she’s talking to you. Now, you may be inclined to bite your tongue and be lovely about it, not mentioning that you don’t require a smoker. After all, you don’t require to piss her off, right? Wrong. Here’s where qualification kicks in. Imagine going on like this:
Her (laughing): Well, only occasionally!
(there! She’s qualifying herself to you!!)
You: Hang on a second there. You smoke? Ugh! That’s despicable!
(turn away with a playfully overdone look of disdain on your face)
You: Yeah? Like, only when you’re awake? I knew there was a string attached to you.
The key here is to be playfully challenging.
Yes, she can have your affection, but she has to work for it. When you present a challenge, don’t make it insurmountable: you’re willing to be with a smoker if she makes an hard work to cut it down or smoke outside? Lovely. If smokers are an absolute, rock-solid no-go for you though, and she clearly smokes a lot and has no purpose of changing that, well then you guys don’t fit together.
4. The concept of investment
The more someone invests in something, the more they ultimately require to get it. If a woman signals that he is willing to make an hard work for your affection, that’s a clear sign of attraction. Don’t underestimate these small things. The more confident you are about yourself, the more boldly you can ask for her investment. If delivered with the right kind of tenure, you can even open a woman with a qualification query: “Are you friendly?”
In general, though, you don’t require to start qualifying a girl right away. Spend some time talking to her, build interest, intrigue and attraction, and then subtly introduce your “woman requirements” in to the interaction. recall: receive a girl to invest in you than investing much in to her soon. Women are attracted to challenging men.
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